17 Jul 2008

I am still a very part of the world, therefore measured by the worldy standard.

The world measured you by your status - your promotion and your salary... I know I am still very part of this because when I realised that I am very due for promotion and not being so, I have that very strange feelings - though I know very well that what I have pursue is very different. I console myself that promotion and pay is related and console myself that I am earning much much more than those who had been promoted - what a real sick person am I!

Rom 4:1 What then shall we say was gained by [5] Abraham, our forefather according to the flesh? 2 For if Abraham was justified by works, he has something to boast about, but not before God. 3 For what does the Scripture say? “Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness.” 4 Now to the one who works, his wages are not counted as a gift but as his due.

The world measure your works based on your due - wages. The Isaiah Initiative is about kingdom giving - measured not by works but by fatih that the Lord will bring all to past - that He will bless, He will provides and He will lead.

If it is by works, indeed, I will boast how good am I and that is why the results and the good wages owe to me. The believe lead to a fatih call and a moving out to move into the promise land. God has showed me that how much immearsureable He can provide - the 100,000 talents of gold David has to build the temple.

Why then, am I still so so part of the world. When I check my account yesterday, it was still short of 20euro, but when I check it again this morning, it was 100euro above target, even minus off the interest, there was still 70euro - why am I still not satisfy?

Lord, I pray against this hording and comapring spirit. I pray that I will be able to come to a point that I can leave my current work place. I pray the setup and that they will quickly take shape and am assured of the steady income.

Why then am I praying in that matter? Where is that fatih of Abraham that I can take what I have already been bless with and leave, leave to claim the promise land?

Lord, you know the struggles in my heart - complex with the world and the desire of the promis land pulling me in both directions.

My consolation in blessings are my family. That you have blessed me with Rachael, Josef and Deborah.

My consolation is also in the few good men - and be accountable for all the money matters.

My joy should be in the Lord, pursuing that joy. I pray therefore continue to change my perspective of thing. That these struggles are real, but I can say 1 day, that the Lord has seen me through.